Another Forward!

Yes, Catherine is my main source of forwards. Occasionally there is a vaguely entertaining (but poorly punctuated and typed) one.

Here are some excerpts from one called 'Food for mind and humour' (already not promising).

Food for the mind

A radio commentator, Paul Harvey, quoted a United States congressperson, who noted,
“If we educate without religion, we graduate clever devils.”

Students

The college students grabbed a coin, flipped it in the air and said, “Heads, I’ll go to sleep, tails I’ll stay up. If it stands on the edge, I’ll study.”

Student: Sir, I have a complaint. I don’t believe I deserve a zero on that exam.
Professor: Neither do I, but it’s the lowest grade I can give.

Education

A process by which information is transferred from the notes of a professor to the notes of a student without passing through the brain of either.

Handy guide to modern science:
If it’s green or wriggles, it’s biology. If it stinks, it’s chemistry. If it doesn’t work, it's physics.

Military

A sign on a FSB (KGB) desk:
The secrecy of my job does not permit me to know what I am doing.

Religious

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than walking into a garage makes you an automobile.

I found these fairly amusing. I hope you do too :).